I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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