I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
nutella sex= disaster
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Randomize
