ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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