I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
