Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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