I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
