Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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