To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
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I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
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When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices