the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
