forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Dicks are not precious.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Randomize
