even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
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he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
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Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize