Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
