I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
This is my gift to your gina
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
