My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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