I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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