If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
