No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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