I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
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