Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
