margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
where are my eyebrows?
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