Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
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