2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
