Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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