you have to choose: penises or morals?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize