ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Locals Wish Tourists Would Stop Doing These 27 Things
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
25 True Facts That Sound Fake AF
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.