If you die in college, do you die in real life?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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