I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
