ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
