It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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