Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize