Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
