Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Randomize