party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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