problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
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