My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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