Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize