Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this will be a night to untag.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
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