You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize