all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Can't talk, ducks in the car
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