Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
