She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
