this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Brb crying the tears of my youth
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Randomize
