i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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