would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
