I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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