She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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