we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Randomize
