fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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