'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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