It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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